Married Choir Teacher, Haley Reed, Arrested For 'Playing With A Student's Skin-Flute'


Original story DailyMail

A Kentucky high school teacher has admitted to repeatedly having sex with a student.

Haley Reed, 35, was arrested Thursday and charged with multiple counts of rape and sodomy as well as unlawful transaction with a minor.

Police began investigating the Oldham County High School choir director after receiving a tip about a sexual relationship.

The Oldham County Police Department said Reed admitted to engaging in sexual intercourse and oral sex with a juvenile student eight times on school property between April and June 2018.

Reed, who is married, was arrested with a bond set at $25,000.

'District administrators are aware of the charges against a teacher at Oldham County High School,' the district said in a statement.

So...this one time...at band camp.

Actually, there were eight times.

For those of you who don't know what 'Third-degree sodomy' is, in fancy law language, it simply means our girl gave the victim some blowjibbers; aside from letting him put his tromboner in her, hitting some high notes.

As our gurl here is married, my best guess is (aside from the mental illness) that she probably wasn't getting turned into a soprano in 4/4 time, by her hubby.

A person in the comment section of the DailyMail made a very good point as to why a lot of these married teachers decide to go for the young bucks with the high-T; in order to get a good beat going on the pussy; excellent 'fingering' on the scales of lust.

The woodwind section needs love'n too and Haley decided that our victim needed to have his skin-flute cleaned around eight times during multiple private instructions. Every music teacher will tell you that it is important to clean your instrument, often.

It is common sense and basic hygiene.

The Report Card

Methodology: There is an element of danger that our gurl indulged in with the after-school oral sessions; tightening her embrasure around our victim's woodwind. Eight times; practice makes perfect, as they say! There is point where one is done 'wetting' Reed and then you have to play and perform.

Duets are her favorite.

B-

Integrity: Our gurl, being a music teacher, knows that before you play the woodwind you have to 'wet' the reed. Mrs Reed took this theory and practice a bit too literally and got her student to do exactly that: Get Mrs Reed, wet.

Being married, and having to explain all of this to your husband, you can see how the whole 'wetting the reed' theory may be a bit confusing. Who knows, maybe he will buy into it. Music is an art form; something that normal people wouldn't know a thing about.

B

Presentation/looks: Let's just say that our girl's face is definitely not her high note. She almost looks like Sid from Ice Age in her mugshot. However, she looks way better for her age in dark hair and in her Staff photo. Music is all about symmetry and our gurl is lacking in the rhythm of her face. All I gotta say is that it is time to get a new reed because this one is getting old and has been dampened to the point where the wood is losing it's tension.

C-

Overall Grade

C+

CASE CLOSED

#MeToo #TeachersWorthyofaD #Humor #Satire

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