Today we should take a break from talking about all of my 'struggles' down here in Florida for a bit, and talk about one of the main struggles that a lot of guys come across when they are navigating today's sexual marketplace.
What a lot of men don't realize is that when it comes to sex with a woman, not all sex is the same.
Whenever you are engaging in sex with a woman, you always have to be asking yourself this fundamental question: Is she having sex with me, or does she want sex from me?
You may be a little confused and are wondering, "Gee, idiot, isn't it the same fucking thing? Like....if she is having sex with you, of course she wants to have sex with you!"
Nah uh, bro!
It's time to step into my classroom and get learned!
You have to understand that when it comes to sex and women, they[women] will either use sex in order to get things or to maintain things (i.e the provisioning/relationship) or they will simply use it for carnal pleasure (i.e orgasms and getting those vaginer tingles satiated).
How can you tell if a woman wants sex from you vs. just having sex with you?
Well, a good first indication is whether or not she brings up sex or the prospect of engaging in sex, first.
If you are the one always initiating and never testing or seeing if she just naturally gets wet at the sight of your bod and cock, then you may have an issue with the type of sex you will be engaging in.
Now, if you enjoy 'maintenance sex'/duty sex from a girl or your girlfriend, then fine.
Stop reading and go enjoy some dull sex.
When you are having sex with a woman, it is usually when you've been in a long term relationship or in a sort of transnational relationship in where the woman views you as more of a provider or beta type; she doesn't necessary want sex from you, but will have sex with you in order to get the other side of her hypergmous instinct fulfilled: Provisioning.
When She is Having Sex With You
This type of sex usually goes as such: It's routine based or somewhat feels obligatory on her part. Usually you are pulling off her cloths and your own cloths as she checks her phone for one last minute before you try to put your dick into her dry, or maybe at least, her semi-wet vagina.
You then have to 'warm her up' a bit before you begin to hump her. Her eyes are closed or she staring at the ceiling....checking out completely. Like she would look like if she was waiting for a doctors appointment or in the waiting room at the mechanic's shop while her car is getting 'serviced'. Just....hoping that it doesn't take to long so she can get on with her day.
Lots of women have sex with men and the men that they are with, it doesn't mean that they want to have sex with them.
When She Wants Sex From You
When a woman wants sex from you it is because she really wants sex from you; you are the soul cause of her pussy becoming engorged.
She is craving your cock like a fat kid at the sight of one Polish sausage. The type of sex you will have with a woman who wants to have sex with you is like no other: She will usually be the one calling you up at 2 AM, texting you to find out if you are "busy"; subsequently asking for you to come over or, more likely, she will drive her self over to your place in a hurry.
Upon thy arrival, your girl will proceed to go tribal on your body, pushing you onto the bed as she takes her cloths off all by herself; struggling like Micheal J. Fox (due to unbridled horny-ness) as she tries to shove your cock into her already, sopping-wet pussy while she is on-top of you.
The type of shove-your-cock-into-her-pussy rush job that can only be compared to her pussy being a leaking hole, and your cock being the perfect plugging device. Upon thy hasty insertion, you will notice your girls face turn from one of extreme manic, to a face that can only be compared to a woman having her first ever, chocolate bar.
That's how a woman's face should look like when she inserts (all by her self) your cock into her quivering vagina: Like she just had a piece of cocoa and is in full bliss mode.
She will not move for a few seconds, taking it all in and enjoying the fullness of your cock. She will even go as far as to tell you, "No...don't thrust yet...just...just wait a minute..."
Then, suddenly, she will say something like, "O.K....fuck me."
During your sessions with the girl-who-wants-to-have-sex with you, more than likely you will experience what I like to call: The Ecstasy Claw.
This is where, if you are plunging into her from the missionary, you will notice your back being clawed like a bear or puma, or even your ass being ripped to shreds; because the girl-who- wants-to-have sex with you is cumming so hard, her natural reaction is to scrape and gouge the shit-out-of your skin.
Sounds painful...but its fucking hot.
Think about it....your girl is in so much lust that she is clawing at you, pushing your ass with her feet or the palms of her hands, so that you will thrust even harder into her screaming pussy.
Urgency is the Key to Great Sex
When there is no sense of urgency than a woman is not going to want sex from you, rather she will have sex with you, instead.
I want you to think back to all of the great sex you have ever had in your life. What were the conditions for such sex? I am willing to bet my left nut that the key ingredient in all of those situations was: Urgency.
When you are in a LTR or, heaven-forbid, you decide to move in with a girl, guess what is lost in that transition. Answer: Urgency.
When sex is readily available or within arms reach...there is no real sense of urgency. When you have been gone on a vacation and had left a fuck-buddy behind for a month or so, to then come back home to find said fuck-buddy clawing at your door, that is because of, yes URGENCY. She missed your cock and it was miles away from her vagina for weeks, maybe even months.
When you live with your girlfriend or are married, there is no real sense of URGENCY to have sex immediately or spontaneously. You are both always just there.
Where is the URGENCY?
Sure, you will have sex from time to time, and she will have sex with you when she gets horny from watching McDreamy all night on Grey's Anatomy. She will need to have her ginger tingles settled by the closest penis or if you aren't there; her hand, her wand, the electric toothbrush, or maybe an old flame or neighbor if she is starting to loose respect for you and you are dropping into deep-beta status with her.
Great sex with women is like selling merchandise; you have to create the need and the want; the desire for such a product.
You have to create URGENCY. When this happens you will come to find that it isn't you who is the one pleading with the consumer to buy your product, it will be the exact opposite; they will be storming your store doors like a rabid mob on Black Friday....for your cock.
That, my friends, is when you know a woman wants to be having sex with you.
When it feels URGENT.