PSA: Why You Should NOT Read My Blog
Just like all PSA announcements, it's crazy to think that I have to explain myself and what my craft is all about. Just like how we have to constantly tell people not to drink and drive, or text and drive. If you are too stupid to understand, then you probably should not make something that isn't your business, your business.
I am going to try and make this post "curse free" as much as possible because this article is not for my many readers and followers, no, this article is for outsiders and people who just don't understand the art, business and craft of comedy, satire and just art in general (which is ultimately freedom of expression).
I love my readers, because they are all smart individuals. How do I know this? Well, because if they loyally read this blog or my books, that means THEY GET IT.
First of all, I can't believe that I have to explain this, so consider this charity. I know who my readers are, I can see engagement in my analytics on here. What I can see too are the lurkers, the ones who come on here to spy and to stamp their little feet.
Fact: Do you pay the bills for this website? Answer=NO
Do you have any idea what this type of work involves and entails? Answer: Most likely not.
Are you my publisher? Answer:NO because it is a trick question. I own the copyright and rights to everything you see on this website, including the whole sale rights to all my books. I AM THE OWNER. YOU ARE NOT. Which means you are not the boss. That is why I do this. I am the boss and I own myself. I get to do what ever the [insert swear] I want, how I want it, and when I want to do it. That is why I am the AUTHOR and you are not.
There is a disclaimer in the ABOUT section of my website. If you are someone who doesn't have a sense of humor (i know its hard in a politically correct society), are EASILY offended by reality, and take issue with my brand, my style, but ultimately my right to FREE SPEECH. You are the problem. To me, that is really disturbing. To suggest or try to influence an influencer when you are a nobody, or to condemn an artist, writer, comedian for doing their job is asinine and quiet frankly, appalling. It is deeply troubling from a societal standpoint. If you don't understand what I am getting at you should go read a book called 1984 by George Orwell or A Brave New World by Aldous Huxley.
If you are offended or take issue with certain posts on here, such as Female Teacher Sex Scandals, it is very puzzling why you would take issue with THE WRITER. If anything you should be taking issue with THE CRIMINALS. Ok, I get it...if I were to write about MALE teachers or perhaps Harvey Weinstein--and men who touched some washed-out actresses leg twenty years ago but is now claiming sexual assault because their career is going in the shitter, than I guess I would be a hero in your eyes. Aren't I right?
Yet, because I am specifically addressing the countless, on a daily basis mind you, female teachers doing the real #MeToo; that is getting swept under the rug of society, I am the bad guy. And i get it., don't get me wrong, I get why you are mad. I would be too. It is horrible what is happening. Or, you should be at least. What I DO as an artist and writer is bring these issues to light, in the only way I know how to deal with them (the disturbing nature of these CRIMES) which is to SATIRIZE them. If you DON'T understand what SATIRE is then go do some homework and watch South Park or get a dictionary out.
So please, if you do not like reality, if you do not like how I "do things" or my WORK, then don't come here. How hard is that? It's what I do when i don't like something, I simply do not keep coming back to it. I go read something else or to another website or whatever. If you can't help yourself from coming on to this site then what does that say about you? Deep down inside you must like it? I dunno? I don't know you and what motivates you to keep coming here. I know why my readers do though....because I WRITE FOR THEM. THEY ARE MY AUDIENCE. It is like going to see a comdian and telling him to stop writing jokes, and to stop making fun of the follies of society. That is INSANE. That is THEIR JOB. How would you like it if I came to your work everyday and told you to "knock it off"?
I will end with the following quote that perfectly addresses what is going on here:
"If you don't have any haters, it means you are not doing it right."--Tom Leykis
So, thanks for letting me know I am doing a great job as a satirist.
Have a great day. Buh bye now.